Jo Smiles: I Sing Lullabies

2010-01-30T13:31:00.002-05:00

the ultimate disappointment in my life. i don't know what to do or who tell. it's ruining me but i can't let it ruin anyone else. but by keeping quiet im protecting it. if i say something i kill someone's soul. but it's not my place to judge or condemn that's up to my almighty Father. the only Father that knows right from wrong. day by day I feel weaker holding on to this, i feel sick. my stomach, my head, my body. what do i do? what do i say? Lord, help me.

2010-01-24T20:22:00.003-05:00

ive lost so many friends. or let go of them. or been let go of, and at times im hopeless, careless, souless. but... I find some strength to love again to let go and let God. disappointed many times. many many too many times. but if i walk around around with a heavy heart and clouded mind i most definitely wont find what im looking for. misery loves company. more more more. on the outside i smile, im carefree, im open. inside i doubt, i remember before, i can't.

Break Break Down....

2009-12-28T00:40:00.004-05:00

Ok, fellas I'm going to TRY and be CLEAR with this. If you read this objectively it might be an EYE-OPENER, but if you are sensitive, you will be a little heated.

Ya'll are the biggest hypocrites of all time.

I say this because I am SO SICK and TIRED of hearing you guys say the following:

"Girls, don't know what they want!"

"I hate girls who play GAMES!"

"Girls say ONE thing and DO another!"

You can't be serious. You CAN NOT be SERIOUS!?

-But let me be realistic and honest.-

Now, I admit. [Some] Women are HORRIBLE at clearly communicating to a man what it is they want exactly because [some] women DO play games.

They do so, because they feel that you sir, are initiating the game.

I have guy friends. And it's pretty much a general response I get when I ask, "what kind of girl are you looking for?"

Most guys want a "good girl". They want the girl that ISN'T at the club every week. Hell, they prefer that their girl don't EVER go to a club. They want her to be HOMEBODY, the type that won't be out at all types of the night. They want a girl with a GOOD education and a GOOD job. They want a girl who has a GOOD head on her shoulders and isn't caught up with anything that comes out of ANY guy's mouth.

But yet....

The guys who want this "good girl" and complain that girls play too many games and don't know what they want, are the SAME guys who go to [insert hyped club name here] every week, get 4+ girls number and sleep around.

I'm sorry fellas, you're playing yourselves. Good girls clearly see you ain't really about ANYTHING serious. Why waste time?

So this is WHY when you do muster up the courage to get that good girl, she don't want you! Cause you the SAME fool, that was at [insert club name here] going SMACK at her HOMEGIRL.

You say you want one type of girl, but you're seen chasing after the opposite. Not willing to give up 4-5+ girls on the side, but still want to stamp that ONE girl.

Bahahaha, I swear.

Ra Ra Ra Ma Ma Ra Ma Ra Ma Ma Ga Ga Ohh La La

2009-12-19T13:46:00.001-05:00

she's the best! Period

It Ain't Me, Babe

2009-12-19T12:34:00.002-05:00

I'm not one to male-bash. thats just not me. i do joke around from time to time and say "there's no such thing as a good man" but deep down I know there is one. Hell, I probably know one myself! But it's true when I say I haven't met one for me yet. I got a lot of good guy friends but I know no guy who is SERIOUS about a relationship who also happens to be a good guy.

maybe I'm just too picky. I want the best of the best for me. I know I'm not the TOP of the LINE, GRADE A, top SHIT, but if I found a guy who would do all he can to be that for me, I would do the same. in fact I WANT to. but I just haven't found Mr. Right.

so if all else fails by age 25, I'm a have to keep it moving. I'm a head straight to the sperm bank =D ---Holla!

Confessions

2009-12-16T23:24:00.002-05:00

I've always loved her. I remember when I first saw Friday After Next. Whew! I thought she was the most beautiful person, God ever let me see! Ever since then she was added to my lists of most beautiful women, PERIOD. She joins: Stacey Dash and Selena. My 3 ladies! K.D. Aubert, read up on her, she's such a GOOD PERSON. You don't find to many Hollywoods who are but she is definitely a DIAMOND who gets no love! One day she'll blow WAY UP and everyone will be hop-ons, but I was here first! :)

Love Jo =-)

Stefani-Ish

2009-12-16T23:17:00.006-05:00

Lady Gaga - [ F i l t h y P o p ]

I love this song so much. You have no idea! It sounds really Gwen Stefani-ish but Jádore! Lady Gaga is hot, I new it when I first heard Just Dance! She USED to be on point with fashion, but sometimes she just does too much. Gaga, go back to square one, please! ;-)

Love Jo =-)

Fears

2009-12-11T10:58:00.003-05:00

not ever having children
not getting married
my mom being taken away from me too soon
not graduating with a b.s. (already have 2 a.a.)
not finding a good somebody for me

stole this from my boo love chae visit her page at www.chatticathii.com

2009-11-23T00:28:00.001-05:00

she's so beautiful. i love her. :)

(adrina lima)

2009-11-23T00:22:00.001-05:00

"I can love you...a little better than she can...oooh ooh oooohh ooooh...." Steve Madden ($99.95)

real rap

2009-11-23T00:07:00.007-05:00

what you mean have i ever loved before?

you probably haven't either!

what you mean have i given my heart before?

you probably haven't either!

what you mean im not like other girls?

you probably think I haven't heard that either!

what you probably mean is

hiIhavenothingtoofferyouandthereforenothingtoloseso

don'tlistencloselytowhatimbouttotellyoucause

I know you probably can do better if you choose.

unclear

2009-11-20T00:31:00.002-05:00

i don't disservice anyone in my life.

friend, foe, associate, fuhk it, whatever it maybe.

i tell like it is. 95% of the time i do so politely, but the 5% is out there, don't overlook your turn.

im known to say things and verbally tell you how it's gone be and it happening later.

so watch you do to me.

hmph.

2009-11-20T00:17:00.001-05:00

aww i like them. i just order some shirts. i fucked with animaniacs.

12.18.09

2009-11-16T15:01:00.002-05:00

Santa Fe.

details soon...

1. Joanne

2009-11-16T13:40:00.003-05:00

A girl who seems innocent , but also knows how to have fun. Joannes are usually beautiful, have slender and sexy bodies, extremely smart, and get all the guys.

(taken from urbandictionary.com)

how are all of these SO true? :o)

2. Joanne

2009-11-16T13:40:00.002-05:00

The lucky people who are named Joanne are attributed special qualities such as beauty, intelligence and compassion. They are loved by everyone and everything thing. Babies crawl to them and dogs wag their tails. Joanne's are the most adorable people ever. They have the innocent element that attracts all men, but only devotes themselves to one special guy.

(taken from urbandictionary)

5. Jo

2009-11-16T13:38:00.001-05:00

the female version of Joe. Usually short for Joanna, Jolene, Josephine, and other such "Jo" names.

Usually arises in the form of a sassy, small (in stature) female.

Girls with this name tend to know where they are going in life. They love to have fun, but are always looking ahead at their goal. She knows what she wants, and she knows exactly how she is going to get it.

On the outside she has a tough shell and tries to be a badass, but deep down she is a hopeless romantic. She wants and can't wait to fall head over heels.

Perfect match: probably something that starts with an E, like Evan.

Pet peeves: things that start with Ts, like Tony's and Travis's

(taken from urbandictionary.com)

hypocrite

2009-11-16T10:18:00.002-05:00

i can't stand the dude that nags and complains all the time about women

"oh i hate the women who don't realize they got a good man, trying to treat them right"

or

"tired of seeing a grown ass woman saying being single is the life but yet want boyfriend #2"

fuck you and your bullshit dude. cause dudes say and ACT on them same words.

now granted, i don't condone or even participate in man-bashing, but when i see a man bashing on a woman for man-bashing, you lose all your credit.

guys always want to run around telling girls that your current dude is nothing like your ex-dude but yet you turn around and say "met a girl at the club she said niggas aint shit and i thought to myself she aint nothing but another pussy"

give me a break. practice what you preach.

no two books are exactly alike. might have similar concepts, ideas and even quotes, but if you thoroughly read BOTH you'll see that they are 1024 pages DIFFERENT in their entirety.

party, party, party let's all get waasssted ;o]

2009-11-11T22:40:00.003-05:00

tomorrow is the big day!

it is my twin's bday. i love you so much adriana.

AND

our big birthday bash!

if you've been invited i hope to see you there! if you haven't been invited there's NO hard feelings, i probably just don't have your NUMBER or E-MAIL.

if you'd like to attend, please E-MAIL me at J0SMILES@yahoo.com (it's a zero in my name) or TWITTER me at twitter.com/j0smiles (which is also a ZERO)

if you need a reminder of time, place, day, or WHATEVER just hit me up at the aforementioned contacts.

love you! =^]

piano lessons.

2009-10-19T01:15:00.000-04:00

Don't bet on me I'm a longshot,
I might bet a million to one.
So don't bet on me I'm a longshot,
But in a million i might be the one.
the one

come over

2009-10-08T12:50:00.000-04:00

Can I (come over)
Get wit' ya (come over)
Just wanna (yeah-e-yeah)
Be wit' ya baby

So tell me what the deal?
You’re not that far
I just got my bags
And I'm headed to the car
Say yes or no
Cuz I'm on the road…

Um..Wait a minute, my battery's low...lemme… aight

tears dry on their own.

2009-10-07T23:13:00.003-04:00

thanks to bhrittney for opening my eyes.

love is sweet. love is kind. "..if it HURTS it AINT love"

***

happy birthday to my favorite DJ. Zay! You're too cool. 8]

***

today i vented to my sister (sorry), and it felt good. it's what i needed. after my vent i finally ate FOOD. i don't even remember the last time i had any. i've just been eating gummi bears and drinking mucho mango.

***

now i go back to black.

concentration

2009-10-06T11:51:00.003-04:00

current mood: bleh
current song: sean garret - up in my heart (feat. gucci mane) -- link at bottom

i have no life.
been playing this since 6 o clock this morning with my brother. ugh i need motivation in my life.
***
also this came in the mail today. all FOUR yes 4 LBS of it! : )
i will reveal its contents soon. ^_^

***
Sean Garrett feat. Gucci Mane - Up In My Heart

niggas want to leave when you say you out M U S T A R D

2009-10-06T02:31:00.002-04:00

Apparently someone who I loved has made claims that I was:

undeserving
wack

Bashed, tore, strip and totally disrespected me in every single way & since these allegations and verbal attacks have started (way back) I've always been silent and yielded. Never did I publicly or on twitter speak ill or target this person in any of my tweets. I'm hurt but at the same time I'm feeling fortified. All these years I spent my time putting the blocks together for an unmoving and repelling wall only to be a FOOL to believe someone could love me.

When love doesn't work out cause the time isn't right does that justify hatred or a distorted disconnection? Would someone who claimed they had love for me so recently have the ability to suddenly call me WACK and UNDESERVING when I've never assigned you as a person with fault and only looked to you with understanding? Yeah I was a fool. A big FUCKING fool. Now my heart is heavy and my mind swirls with regret. (Love) Fooled me twice, shame on me.

And now I feel sorry for myself. Cause I know I won't give anyone the chance to get close to me again, when a great guy is probably gone make his way to me.

J U S T M Y L U C K __________x

Response: Tila Tequila

2009-10-05T11:37:00.006-04:00

"Suicide (Latin suicidium, from sui caedere, to kill oneself) is the intentional killing of one's self."
Warning signs that an individual is imminently planning to kill themselves
may include the person making a will, getting his or her affairs in order,
suddenly visiting friends or family members (one last time), buying instruments
of suicide like a gun, hose, rope or medications, a sudden and significant
decline or improvement in mood, or writing a suicide note.
Contrary to popular belief, many people who complete suicide do not tell any
mental-health professional they plan to kill themselves in the months before they do so.
If they communicate their plan to anyone, it is more likely to be someone with
whom they are personally close, like a friend or family member.
This is in no way, shape or form an attempt to bash Tila or to poke fun at her, but more so an attempt to understand, too many missing pieces for this puzzle to make any sense. If any comments I make sound offending, they're not meant to be.
OfficialTila: I will give u two more weeks, but after that i shall be leaving. 2 more weeks until u weep for my life that has finally ended.

OfficialTila: We all have to go at some point in time, but my time is soon, so i can finally rest my mind. 2 more weeks and then we shall say goodbye.

OfficialTila: ppl take life 4 granted, but im trying 2 change that so u wont take life 4 granted anymore. Let me sleep now. ill share my life 4 2 mo weeks

OfficialTila: I have just lost hope for mankind. They are morbid creatures and im tired of being here trying 2 help ppl when everyone is so ignorant.

I've seen so many TT (trending topics) and RT (retweets) and @replies toward Tila, but never spoke out on it, cause 1) it's twitter 2) celebrities only greet their human counterparts: celebrities. But this is truly disturbing, ridiculous and a huge offense to everything I believe in terms of spirtual and religious matters. But I'm not trying to preach to anyone.

So you're telling me, that you plan to commit suicide and you announce it on Twitter? No doubt you are fully capable of doing so, but on Twitter? You're not calling your family? Close friends? Keeping this private? With as MUCH followers as you have, you think announcing it on TWITTER is the best way to go about this? First off at about 12:12PM 10/5/2009 you have 258,656 followers. Who probably follow and are followed by at least 500+ people who are going to spread these TWEETS of you promising to end your life. This will reach people in your workplace, close circle, and everyone will be CALLING you, INTERVENING, and all the above when you give a TWO WEEKS deadline.

And then to put God's name in this. To say you tried to save mankind? How? What did you do? You speak of philanthropy, I looked up and saw your name NO WHERE except as an attendee at Russel Simmons event a couple of weeks ago.

OfficialTila: I was the chosen one to come down here and be a messenger to try to help save the world. But the world lost hope. My job is done here. <--- What have you done, though? In all seriousness.

OfficialTila: I have just lost hope for mankind. They are morbid creatures and im tired of being here trying 2 help ppl when everyone is so ignorant. <-- everyone else in this world are morbid creatures and ignorant?

OfficialTila: I know more about God than any of u. I had 6 near death experiences and died a few times N docs brought me back 2 life I seen the other side <-- how dare you make a claim like this. Who are you to judge and hold a position as one to know who knows God and how much? I think that's the most offending statement of them all. Call me a morbid creature, call me ignorant! But don't tell me I know NOTHING or anywhere as close as YOU about God. What kind of God-fearing, God-loving person tells that to people? Never heard Mother Theresa, John the Baptist say ANYTHING like this to ANYONE. So who are YOU?

OfficialTila: I know SO much about why the world is ending in 2012. God has given up on you humans U only get worse. He has lost faith in you... <-- That doesn't sound like my God. "God so loved the world, that he gave his ONE and ONLY son. That who so ever believes in him, will not perish but have EVERLASTING LIFE."

OfficialTila: I know so much about this because I am the chosen one to be the messenger. But mankind has no hope 4 being saved anymore. <-- You are the chosen one? You. Why you? Help me understand. The last chosen one, lived his life as the poor. Walked around praying, helping and revealing truths to others. He didn't live his life as a glam model, doing photoshoots, on twitter, partying, attending celebrity functions or have ANY money. So why are YOU the chosen one for me? You don't represent me in any way. Don't tell me that. He didn't commit suicide when people persecuted him and told him he WASN'T the Messiah. He continued preaching his word and loving everyone until he was BETRAYED, CAPTURED and KILLED. So I don't see how God would choose you to do his work, for you to ABANDON it by commiting SUICIDE.

OfficialTila: and believe me...once I die...and I am right by God's side..trust that he & I will make a list 4 all u ppl condoning suicide. Ur goin 2 hell <-- it's wrong to condone suicide but it's acceptable to commit suicide? And are you saying you have committed no WRONG in this life on EARTH? And if not, and you know you have faults, when is the last time you SEEKED and BEGGED forgiveness for ANY wrong you've done?

OfficialTila: I guarantee U that at least 40 people who are following me on Twitter will be dead by the end of this year. Guaranteed. Statistics dont lie <-- Why would God's chosen one say this? If anything shouldn't you pray that God forbid this from happening? I wouldn't predict that on ANYONE.

OfficialTila: Cuz it shoulda been on TT by now but its not. Twitter hates me so they blocked every TT I do from getting on trends. LAME. <-- it's so important to you that they allow the fact that you want to commit suicide a TRENDING TOPIC on TWITTER? But the fact that it is not is LAME?

OfficialTila: How come Twitter doesn't block Souljaboy with his weird TT or when FAB does it...but how come Twitter only blocks me? So lame. <-- because they don't announce on Twitter they plan to kill themselves and how they are God's chosen one. They also don't call the world morbid creatures or ignorant. They also don't TEST the faith of OTHERS in God. That's just you.

OfficialTila: I'm tired of working hard just to give away 50% of my tax money to pay for YOUR lame asses whos talking shit 2 me right now.... <-- No words. I went to pre-K, grade school, high school and will be graduating college in 2010 with a degree. I've worked since I was 16 saved most of my pennies and YOU give away 50% of your tax money to WHO?

OfficialTila: Please get an education. Please stop using the "RACE" card in every situation & stop talkin shit when ppl like me are paying 4 ur food! nite <-- You graduated college with what degree? What is your career? If you can't do modeling or act anymore, what matriculation from school have you acquired to support yourself financially? I'm curious.

OfficialTila: Yea so keep hatin u ignorant fools. Just remember...I AM THE ONE PUTTING FOOD ON UR TABLE! That's right. MY TAX MONEY PAYS FOR YOU! <-- So I guess without you, all of us drop dead? Every last one of us? From East coast to West coast. We all are counting on you? The chosen one sent from our Heavenly Father to save us but feels that we are morbid creatures and too caught up ignorant to be saved and so in turn in the efforts to wake us up and show us God's Word, you will abandon God's life purpose he plant you on Earth by commiting suicide so that Twitter will allow you to be a TT?

OfficialTila: Violence violence violence, try 2 stop it if u can, kill more people if u must. But that won't solve anything.....free hatred from ur heart. <-- yes free ourselves of hatred. While you tell 258,779+ that we are MORBID, IGNORANT creatures part of the HUMAN RACE that is NOT WORTH SAVING according to GOD and that we are "LOWLIVES" who are given over 50% of your money to FEED OURSELVES.

I'm sorry, I'm not buying this. Nowhere in the bible or teachings of God does it say that he wants us to bash others and call them ignorant, lowlives, morbid creatures. To tell others they are a disgrace, and to personally deliver the WORD as him saying we as a people, humankind are a DISAPPOINTMENT and not worth saving. Ghandi, Mother Theresa, John The Baptist are the 3 people I believe were truly chosen ones. They lived their lives as Christ did, helping others. When people tainted their name, they didn't log on twitter and vent. They CONTINUED to help them. They lived their life in a way that Jesus did, and tried to save everyone they came in to contact with until their dying day. And for a girl born Tila Nguyen to change her name to an alcholic beverage, Tila Tequila, and to live the life she lives, partying, nude modeling, reality TV, does not make her a BAD person, NO, because God gives us all life from day ONE and loves us all SO MUCH he gives us all the choice on how we CHOOSE to live it. But I'm sorry Tila, you are not the chosen one. You're faith in God, seems so strong, but it's oh so cloudy and distorted. Read the bible, start to finish, for the next two weeks. And live your life as John the Baptist, Jesus and so many others did. Give up your "fame and fortune" and truly live in a Jesus-like way. Not on twitter.

2009-09-30T11:03:00.002-04:00

happy birthday blogger. :)

looking for a birthday dress myself. i need it to be... vavavoooom. hehehe.
anywho, im doing homework para l'escuela.
ok, bye bye.

day 1.

2009-09-27T23:30:00.002-04:00

did some necessary reflection today and discovered some things about myself:

selfish
sometimes i think i'm the only person who goes through what i go through and im really at the bottom of the map, when really, i'm not. nobody's problems is WORSE than anyone else's but we all go through our strife. i need to stop thinking about ME and comparing myself with others in any and every situation.

heavy-hearted
i got so many grudges from my past i honestly don't even remember why i'm holding any of them. im not here to beg forgiveness or pardon, but honestly i got no hate in my heart for anyone. that holds me back from living. you can hate me, talk about me, play me, diss me, whatever i don't care. but i got to keep living my life.

-fin

neglect x sincerity = apology.

2009-09-23T21:50:00.003-04:00

yes, i haven't been using this.
but it's not like there was a protest for my comeback.
so, we're even.
touche.
anywho, i'm back because i was CHALLENGED.
i was challenged to maintain my blog until my birthday

NOVEMBER 10th : all gifts, money, donations can be directed to Joanne Smiles :)

but yeah anywhos.
just to keep current.
i am currently dating someone.
his name is Benjamin Franklin.
he's about 2in high and 2in wide.
and he fits comfortably in my back pocket. >;)
mwahahahahahehe.
and that's about it.
tomorrow is a new day, and i'll have something WORTH blogging about.
till then, sayanara suckas

xoxoxoxox ; jo

2009-08-28T10:38:00.002-04:00

people = yuck.

that's ok.

i smile i smile i smile anyway.

Allow me to reintroduce myself.

2009-07-15T09:32:00.001-04:00

I officially do not care about anyone.
♥ J0SMILES ツ

2009-06-17T13:25:00.000-04:00

Sexy.....I know. ;) Lls

2009-06-14T00:05:00.001-04:00

I think you should know I have soft lips...hold your breath, count to 3,
make a wish, I think you should know I have soft lips.

2009-06-05T12:59:00.001-04:00

twitter is making me mad so i've resorted to blogging. they want tell me, i reach my limit for the DAY on tweets, that i made too many! they suck. first they tried to hold me back from uploading profile pics, then they used to make all my @replies disappear, and now I tweet too much. twitter got too many rules....they lucky im so addicted or else i'd go back to facebook. i think it's all the #followfriday love i did today on twitter since 10am! you do something good on twitter then they come around and limit ya ass!

here's some random things im paying attention to now

girl in jeremih's video has these shoes that i'd even wear and i HATE heels.
when is jamie foxx's song "life is good" gone make it's way to the radio
why has it rained this whole week?
i want some el pollo rico, RIGHT NOW.
i wonder what im going to do with my life this weekend
why ain't my 2 job paychecks in my bank accounts?
why do cops tailgate my ass then when they drive up next to me and see it's me (a light skin girl) just nod and drive away? the fck?
how does my mom know i'm in love with dwight howard? i must've said something in my sleep...
why do all these guys from neighboring businesses come to my bank branch everyday using the SAME lines to get me to give them my number when it ain't work the last 5 days?

;o)

Twitter Me Baby....

2009-06-03T20:24:00.002-04:00

If you don't have a twitter, screw you! Go get one, now!

But in the meantime, for all my twits/tweeple/tweets/twitterers, hear me out on this...

My name is J0SMILES and I'm a Twitter Addict. I love twitter. I think it's the best social networking site ever possibly created. It's not like facebook or myspace which encourages us to post way too much information and photographs of ourselves which draws in pedophiles, stalkers, rapists and killers. And it's mad simple! All you need to is update your status on what's going on with you at the time in 140 letters or less --THAT IS ALL. And you can do it straight from your phone!

Now here's my ONLY con with Twitter: Celebs.

Ok, if you're a celeb and you have a twitter, kudos to you. I understand you guys following other celebs and what not cause you know them, that's cool. But why do you guys advertise and tell EVERYONE to follow you if you NEVER reply back to them with the exception of other celebs!? That makes no sense. I twitter to everyone, people I know, random people who tweet me, it's all good. It's a SOCIAL NETWORK. Networking involves reaching out to OTHER people in OTHER networks OTHER than your OWN.

Don't you all have each other's numbers? AIMs? Emails? Live in the same neighborhoods? Apartment Complexes? Work at the same studio? Record Label? Couldn't you find time to talk to each other then? Or at your little CELEB parties? Movie Premieres? EXCLUSIVE weddings? AWARD SHOWS? Why must ya'll SHUT US OUT on twitter?

That's why I don't follow ANY celeb, UNLESS they are FOLLOWING me! I feel utterly sorry for all the loving die hard fans who show their devotion EVERY day by writing to you all for them to only see your new status say, "@iamdiddy let's do lunch!" or "@aplusk ROCKS" or whoever else! That's why I don't even set myself up for it cause if I did, I'd be a big ol' hater to some celeb who don't even know that I have a heart that pumps blood and keeps me alive.

But anywho...that's enough of my VENT.

I'm off to dedicate the next 5 hours of my life that I'll never get back, playing The Sims 3.

0:-)

2009-05-27T00:54:00.002-04:00

ATTENTION: the following material is very...out there.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlNZzXlV2g0 - You are officially suspect and have lost yo mind.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mND0xS1xIk - funniest reply to the aforementioned video ^^ + they're fine as hell. @ least 2 of them.

oh and follow me baby ....

2009-05-22T02:51:00.001-04:00

Guys. Quick word of advice.
I understand self-confidence & esteem.
Completely and totally understand it.
But here's my thing.
I hate when a guy confuses my friendliness and niceness for attraction!
No!
Just cause I smile at you does not mean there's a sign that says "Bobo
would like to f_ck".
No.
Understand...
If only guys knew...
I'm friends with a lot of guys and to be honest out of all the friends I
got there's 0 I'm interested in.
Cause newsflash: THAT'S WHY YOUR MY MOTHERF-CKING FRIEND!
I hold you to same standards as a female friend.

So please.
Don't get me confused.
Just don't.
For your own safety.

♥ J0SMILES ツ

2009-05-18T03:16:00.001-04:00

step your @*#!& up.

2009-05-16T01:24:00.001-04:00

I guess I'm literally the best you never had.

2009-05-15T01:20:00.001-04:00

If I spent all my time, putting my heart, soul, faith, trust in any guy
who tried to pursue me I'd be setting myself up. I'd really rather live
a life not know love than to get screwed over. Count me out,
e-mmediately!

2009-05-11T22:17:00.001-04:00

"just when i decided love itself was just a made-up story, you made it real to me...tell me what the chances are...you and me together forever...something that i swear i've done before...wont let nothing happen to this feeling love and cuddle with me, is this what i was created for baby? for eternity i made my mind up can't believe finally found you, my one true love, i'm living deja-vu"

2009-05-11T22:04:00.002-04:00

as of today i officially have 3 jobs = $$$$$

montgomery county rec. dept. (assistant director)
new york & company (sales associate)
td bank (teller)

and i will be taking 2 summer classes (human anatomy I & nutrition) = 7 credits.

so, i pretty much will have 0% time & no existing social life.

but all this hard work will one day pay off.

for now...

Chem Final Tomorrow AM
PSYC203 Final Thurs AM
BI107 Final Fri AM

someone say a prayer for me, gracias.

2009-05-06T22:44:00.003-04:00

congrats celtics.
it's really kind of hard for me to root this series cause i LOVE celtics but i also LOVE dwight howard.
but they're both great teams and i'm sure this series will be hell-a interesting.
1 more week until mental freedom...

"To the man who only has a hammer, everything he encounters begins to look like a nail."

2009-05-03T21:32:00.001-04:00

"go into the booth & just change like Clark Kent, Lamborghini dark tint, philly blunt cigar scent, I'm by myself & niggas run they mouths like auctions."

2009-04-30T02:04:00.000-04:00

confessionsofaprocrastinatingyoungadult

ok i'm procrastinating on the next blog, but no biggie. when i come with it, i COME with it.
until then, imagine me, in skinny jeans + white tee + cream chucks stressed out cause of la escuela.
Triste....

2009-04-28T02:45:00.002-04:00

have an interesting blog topic to write about...BUT i won't be blogging it until tomorrow night. it's real late in the AM and i got CLASS so im going to try and dis-attach myself from twitter and get some shuteye! meanwhile i need all of you to pray for me. most of you may not know me personally and most of you do, but just pray that a young 20 year-old female who's got a GOOD head on her shoulders and wants to GO somewhere in life will be ACCEPTED to Towson University. i need all the love, support, wishes and prayers i can get. although i might not be able to thank everyone individually, i really do appreciate it.

buhbye.

2009-04-22T02:22:00.003-04:00

retiredshoes.

so my old dance teacher hits me up. he wants to know if i still been dancing and would i be interested in a tour with an artist. i want to but i don't want to. that involves time x commitment and i got too much other stuff i want to do (i.e. graduate college, B.S. Nursing). and to be honest i haven't been keeping myself too much updated with dance. all of my dancing buddies are gone to college and hunguptheirshoes. ah i wish DMV had more REAL dancers.

o.w.l. ongoingweightloss

i don't know if it's cause i've cut out certain foods (fast food) but my ongoingweightloss has projected with me losing 8lbs in water weight in 1 week. and im comfortably shifting from size 8 to 6. but what puzzles me, is the fact that my *donk remains. don't get me wrong, i like my rump and when i stand in the mirror it looks a normal size to me, i just don't like all the *unwanted attention it gets me.

glassawater.

there's this bio teacher that has been incessantly flirting with me at school. no he's not attractive. he's bout 50+ years old and has once told me "girl you a baby, i got corns on my feet older than you!" but yet he's persistent to try and get me to "spend time" with him. i try to play it off and handle it accordingly by politely refusing, reminding him im a student not his peer, but he keeps on keeping on like it ain't nothing like a glassawater.

imsotired

i feel like i've been getting 20 minutes of sleep everyday. i'mjustsotired why must there be only 24 hours in 1 day? why? i seriously need like 3 clones so that i can fulfill a day's schedule. someone once told me that once i'm done with school and im locked in my career, id feel so well-rested and carefree. hmmm i question it, but we'll see.

SPECIALdelivery.

so i'm getting into the sneaker game mad late, but whatever. i bought about 12 pairs (no exagerration) and i'm excited to get them and wear them. like i feel l will wear all 12 in one day, just rotate/switch every 2 hours. i swear when i get that fedexdelivery with my kicks and CLOTHES, i'm a just wild out. hehe

singlefortherestofmylife

but i like it like this. i can't focus all my time and commitment into being #1 and to someone else, it's not fair. it's been exactly 3 years since my last relationship and i'm actually going to start not counting it. i mean does anyone feel me out there? anyone been out of a relationship and single for so long that you start to think that your last relationship never existed? like it was annuled? haha, that's how i feel.

cantreadmypokerface

Lady Gaga, basically is next to Mint Condition and Ne-Yo. watch this and then come up with 3 fantastic reasons why i should not hold her up to the same level as them. CLICK HERE

*If you decide that you are indescive, which one are you?*

2009-04-19T23:11:00.003-04:00

letmegetthisRIGHT.

patience is a virtue, im well aware, i feel as though i have been most patient, but maybe thats not enough? im just going to stick to it cause its bound to happen or not happen so either way i wont work myself up for over exaggeration or failure. it is what it is or ain't so i ain't tripping.

gottheMIDAStouch.

ever since ne-yo's latest LP "the year of the genteleman" dropped, i picked "part of the list" as my favorite and should be single, and while everyone was hyping up "MAD" and "CLOSER" my pick got overlooked, but im happy to see that there is now a video for it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fShZc_gLZLw

nextyearwishes.

i always imagine where i'll be in the future so right now i'm thinking this time next year i'll be finishing up a semester in the nursing program at towson, i'll be hanging out with my bessie, i'll be making pesos, i'll have my monte carlo, i'll have a great companion and i'll be mucho happy. =)

closingstatementFIN.

playoffs are going on and right now i care about nothing except my hornets making it to the next round, i expect nothing but the BEST and i refuse to take defeat from nasty little nuggets. also, from now to may 16th i will be so waist deep in (expletive) that i will need YOU to make me feel better. please? *kisses*

2009-04-16T01:26:00.003-04:00

procrastinationsucksSObad .

spendingARABmoneyonforever21,urban outfittersandcusp .

iswearmoneygrowsontrees !

dearSUMMERiMISSyousoMUCH
andiCANTWAITtoseeyouandshowyoumynewBIKINI

loveJO

2009-04-09T21:29:00.001-04:00

so excited. tomorrow is the last day of this school week and i'll have a MONTH left of school.

REJOICE.

then saturday im spending the day in georgetown with squeaks, nay, courtney, steven, manny, roberto, donna, tirza and brandon JUST to name a few cause there'll be more 0:)

then we partying up that night at BLU lounge, indulging in $1 rails.

life is getting good right about now.

:)

2009-04-06T23:51:00.002-04:00

girls like you turn guys like me into haters - the dream

2009-04-02T23:26:00.004-04:00

my friend asked me a question that i want to elaborate my full opinion on.

"What do you say Jo? Do we blame guys for females insecurities?"

i'm not saying i'm right, this is just my take on it...

yes women do blame guys for their insecurities. but we shouldn't. nor should we blame another woman for insecurites. an insecurity is not something anyone can give you like a present or a std. it's something you choose to let develop and foster in yourself. now i am quite aware of circumstances, scenarios and situations (i.e. he cheated, he thinks im fat, he looks at other girls, she only likes guys with money, etc.) but at the same time i'm also aware of SELF-CONFIDENCE, SELF-CONCEPT, SELF-WORTH and SELF-ESTEEM. the world isn't fair...not everyone is out here wanting the best for you. ultimately the only person who wants the world for you and would do anything to give you the world is: you. you got to know that. 9 times out of 10 i'm sure a woman or man with insecurities has all low points in the self- categories. if you have a healthy balanced amount in all four you should be fine and won't have any insecurities to put blame on anyone, but if you do. then that person that's around you is NOT a good look and you should have the analytical, practical and emotional intelligence to know that you need to remove yourself. it's only when you continue to allow this person to be IMPORTANT in your life and to DIRECT who or what you should be do you develop insecurities.

Just be smart :)

2009-04-01T02:16:00.002-04:00

bad habits.

i shoutout lyrics from songs in my head in conversations and expect that the person(s) know what im trying to say
im extremely aggressive when driving
i expect so much from guys (not fair, cause maybe i don't meet their expectations either)
i hold back what i really have to say cause im worried about everyone else
still sleeping with a pillow between my legs =\
twitter ; but i love ya'll
my car is a mess---blergh
taking my rings off when i wash my hand and forgetting to put them back on
yawning like im @ home while i'm in class (everyone always looks at me like wth?)
having hate in my heart

2009-03-30T02:16:00.009-04:00

time...time....time...is on my hands. ;)

so this is me.

2009-03-28T13:41:00.000-04:00

The Scorpio female is an independent soul. She possesses a forbidding, keep-your-distance manner that often hides a secretive and sensitive heart. This is a woman who will risk all for love and not count the cost, but can become bitterly disappointed if her judgment is proved wrong. Undeniably romantic by nature, she demands the near-impossible of those she loves. However, this female is quick to assess personalities and situations, able to put her finger on the crux of a question or circumstance immediately, seeing through all the dross, ignoring the veneer and getting to the truth. In addition, this woman is often at least a little psychic.
She will make a number of good friends, usually keeping them all her life, and her sympathy and understanding are extended to all who come in contact with her. Still, the woman ruled by Scorpio does make for a formidable enemy. She rarely creates animosity willingly, but is sometimes driven into situations that make her the center of some manifestation of jealousy. The contradiction of the Scorpio female character is rather puzzling to some people and endlessly fascinating to others. Outwardly, this always seems to be a relatively selfish woman who gives the appearance of self-centeredness in her concentration on personal affairs and the affairs of loved ones. Still, she can be capable of incredible self-sacrifice. In essence, no two acquaintances will ever view this female in the same manner for she will present a different facet of her personality to each one. As a sweetheart, the Scorpio female is exciting. As a life partner, she is appealing in her determination to be the best possible companion. As a mother, she will be both understanding and disciplinary.
Basically an old-fashioned individual, the woman ruled by Scorpio is loyal and courageous. She enjoys responsibility and is very capable. With a great love of luxury, she possesses considerable taste in home furnishings and other aesthetics. The difference in the atmosphere will very much depend on this female's intensity of feelings. She is a blunt and fearless character, doing everything passionately from the depths of her heart. Her devotion to loved ones is whole-hearted and can almost verge upon idolization at times. Rarely shy by nature, the Scorpio woman has a very healthy appetite for the physical aspect of a romantic relationship.

2009-03-26T00:44:00.002-04:00

hah so there's a scheduled outage today at 4:00PM PDT so around 6:00PM EST. ( I think )
so since i have nothing important to blog about i'll just make it random thoughts thursday.

i want a boyfriend
but i don't want exclusiveness
my mom is expecting me to get married before im 26
i don't even have any potentials
i need to stop acting so tough all the time
i need to stop being so nice
i like my hair it's really soft and smells good
i think im going to buy an ipod touch tomorrow
actually donny is a potential
i wonder what life would be like if i was still with my ex
i wonder what life would be like if i went to nccu
i wonder what life would be like if my parents stayed in ny
or haiti
i wish shamika was closer...
i don't have a lot of REAL true friends
depressed cause i got 10 weeks of school left
i really want to go to my friends party at blu this friday night
i wish that i had my own personal cook who could make me the entire Friday's menu and Carry Out items
i wish i found like $1000 just lying in a lunch bag
i wish there was more than 24 hrs in one day

2009-03-22T10:46:00.003-04:00

today is world water day. sounds silly? to appreciate water? in the toilet, from your sink, in your bath, from your shower, in the fridge, in your home water cooler.

well...more than 1 billion people are living WITHOUT it. can't get to it or find it or afford it anywhere.

i'm drinking water all day today.

(don't drink a GAL all at once, it can be fatal)

but appreciate it, don't take it for granted.

i've given up soda and most juices for about 1 1/2 years now.

go for it !

;)

2009-03-21T02:13:00.003-04:00

awwww... karrine steffans better known as SUPERHEAD

you know what i like her...

i know that sounds crazy but i mean, if you take away all the infamous bad stuff and just get a feel of her personality, she seems so cool and happy go lucky

...i mean it is what its

but honey, even i can't save you on this

i mean, you know we know what we know, you told us! and it looks like no one is taking you serious, BUT people are still reading and catching to it, i guess that's all you need.

i just wish people wouldn't say all the horrible, bad things about her. granted, im aware of all that she has done as i'm sure you are but i mean what you got to admire about her is that she doesn't really LIE on her shit and she's not faking like it wasn't her. why don't we get mad at our male karrine steffans? (chris brown, bow wow, soulja boy, diddy, nfl players, nba players, etc.)

but DOUBLE STANDARD is alive and breathing so i'm not tripping.

let her do her. if you all really didn't like her or support her like you all are making it seem, then stop writing up all these articles attacking her, that's giving her the spotlight and publicity she wants/needs.

haha ;)

2009-03-20T21:37:00.002-04:00

just got asked my opinion on interracial dating (IR) and um i don't care about it at all. done or not done, it doesn't affect me in a negative or positive way. when i'm attracted to a guy i don't think, "i like this BLACK boy" or "white boy", i think more in the terms of, "i like this guy". a man is a man with or without color. comes with all the same parts (there are variations in sizes i know hehe) but if it go tick tock like a clock it's a clock.

but personally i appreciate and love my fellow black men. but i got nothing against whites, hispanics, asians, jigglypuffs or whatever.

what about you?

2009-03-20T21:16:00.001-04:00

i hate when people who are big talkers about expressing their opinions and DEMANDING respect from others for their opinion but when it comes turn for them to listen, they don't want to have it.

practice what you f@cking preach and stop being a little b^tch about it!

2009-03-20T01:59:00.002-04:00

this is kind of old...maybe like 2 weeks but, i couldn't blog about it then, cause i would've done it in a more irrational vengeful manner. i wanted to think about it and cool off. so i can catch my errors. plus i'm like lazy to the umpteenth degree.

so i've known this guy for about 6 years now. feelings (mine) have been the same since day 1--i like him. and i really stupidly believed it was mutual.

now back then i will admit i was not a TEN (nor am I today) i was bout in the 5 range. but i mean hey. i'm not fugly.

for stupid, young reasons we didn't work out and that was that.

i blossomed about a year and a half later and he came back, but i had a bf.

while i was with my bf, he was the only guy i would have broken up with my [then] current boyfriend for. (i don't believe in cheating).

but he was on same games.

he says he cares about me. he says he misses me. but i see no BUJU from this guy (action).
wholetime i hear about him messing with OTHER girls, but i'm just thinking

i'm a good girl. i got nothing to worry about, when he's ready to settle, he will...with me.

so like a DUMB good girl, i waited. since then.

waited...waited...waited...waited...and waited.

and now there' nothing left to say. "irritated, frustrated and hurt...this is so confusing boy i thought this was the right thing for sure."

he lives in Wa***** and I'm here in the Metropolitan Area and we're both reluctant on making the drive, but I made the drive ONE time and I heavily regret it cause since then he basically carried me, no calls, no texts, no nothing.

I hit him up and ask if everything's cool and he says yes, he misses me, blase blah, he's busy, so I'm understanding. And I'm cool.

Not too soon afterwards I see him...at WHEATON mall with a girl.

SOOOOOOOO. You can NOT drive down here to see me and hang out but to the mall with another GIRL this is a POSSIBLE POSSIBILITY?!?

I'm STUPID, SHAMED, EMBARASSED, REGRETFUL AND HURT.

Never ever ever ever ever EVER again.

The End.

2009-03-20T01:36:00.003-04:00

*disclaimer: read every word thoroughly before you respond/comment because often I write and people don't understand who i'm talking about or the point i'm trying to make, if your comment isn't intellectually formed from thoroughly reading i will ignore it and probably delete it. thanks ;)

i find it so confusing how some guys behave.

they complain they hate gold diggers, they don't like broke chicks, they don't like hos, they don't like ugly girls

but everytime i turn my head and look...*BAM* that's the one they're with!

say what you mean and mean what you say.

for example i was hanging with an old friend of mine a day ago and we was playing catch up and it go a little something like this:

him: dang Jo, a lot has changed. where you man at?
me: ha, yeah a lot has. no man i'm just doing the whole school and work thing, it is what it is.
him: so you not looking?
me: well i'm not not looking but i'm not exactly looking either, i mean if it comes, i'll get it.
him: true. i feel you same for me, i'm just staying focused on what i got to do you know? can't save these hos if they don't want to be saved.
me: not just hos, that goes for anyone . can't save no one that don't want to be saved.
him: yea...and i can't stand the chicks that want to come at your pockets, they don't want hang out, go to the movies, or do none of that until they know your bank roll numbers, it's trife.
me: hmmm but seems like most guys work to get all the money and all the flashy things to get their attention... i mean that's the equation, right? Money + Cars = Hos? I don't see no nuns or like professional people running after rappers or athletes.
him: haha, yeah well I'd rather have me a good girl like a nun or a professional educated woman.
me: that's good to hear. ;)

so wholetime i'm thinking man, my homie is going in the right direction, i'm glad i don't have to worry 'bout him making no wrong decisions. *ANH*

[ring]
me: hey
him: hey, what's up. where's a good restaurant in georgetown or anywhere in dc?
me: it's f-cking 11pm go to mickey d's
him: no, no i'm with my girl and she say she don't eat that, she only eats caviar shit and whatnot
me: you have a girl? and she eats what?
him: i'm serious are you gone help me or not?
me: goodnight.

waste of space, waste of anatomy, waste of a soul.

Shriek

2009-03-18T02:34:00.001-04:00

Ah this (along with Lakers losing to Bulls) made my night! Found in urbandictionary.com

5.	Jo	46 up, 10 down
	the female version of Joe. Usually short for Joanna, Jolene, Josephine, and other such "Jo" names. Usually arises in the form of a sassy, small (in stature) female. Girls with this name tend to know where they are going in life. They love to have fun, but are always looking ahead at their goal. She knows what she wants, and she knows exactly how she is going to get it. On the outside she has a tough shell and tries to be a badass, but deep down she is a hopeless romantic. She wants and can't wait to fall head over heels. Perfect match: probably something that starts with an E, like Evan. Pet peeves: things that start with Ts, like Tony's and Travis's Person A: "Yo see that fly honey walking over there?" Person B: "For real. She looks sassy. I'd tap that." Person A: "She's walking like a Jo." Person B: "Yeah. She's hot." Person A: "You don't have a chance." Person B: "Why not? I drive a Honda!" Person A: "Dude your name is Tony, and the Honda thing definitely doesn't help either."

1.	Joanne	261 up, 38 down
	A girl who seems innocent , but also knows how to have fun. Joannes are usually beautiful, have slender and sexy bodies, extremely smart, and get all the guys. guy 1: "That girl looks like a Joanne; she's so fine" guy 2: "I know, damn i wish i could tap that"

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh you know it !!!!! ;)

Question of The Day

2009-03-17T11:38:00.003-04:00

"Why do men cheat?"

It's quite simple really. Ladies get your reading glasses out. And position your chair close to the computer.

Men cheat because...dun dun dun!

A) They're not finding what they want in the relationship
B) You nag too much b!tch!
C) This exclusive relationship was all YOUR idea and you forced him into it and you're not really practicing all those benefits you told him there would be.
D) He's bored!

There you have it!

*Update: It's not exactly vice versa for women, I'm still doing the research/polls I'll let ya'll know by tonight.
Have a nice day ;)

The New Sidekick

2009-03-15T15:20:00.004-04:00

I'm on it! Ahhhhhh July I can't wait to see you! :)

Took Me More Than 5 Min To Understand...

2009-03-15T13:28:00.002-04:00

Dirty!

RanTHOUGHTSdom

2009-03-14T01:09:00.004-04:00

Why did Rihanna go back to him?
What happened to Blaque?
I'm hungry [stanky face].
Is it true that the stanky leg refers to sex?
Why does the weather keep fluctuating?
I can't stand XXS skinny boys wearing XXXS skinny jeans.
Why is my body inversely proportionate to my ' derriere ' ?
Are they going to come out with a Monsters Inc. 2?
Can someone let me know if they do?
Did anyone notice how Drake carried his female fans, saying he'd never wife one or even @ least date?
What do guys think when they think of me?
What do girls think when they think of me?
I can't wait till I graduate.
I want a Chevy Monte Carlo so bad.
I'm hungry.
I'm tired
Why do people still watch and entertain VH1.
They need a channel dedicated to Family Guy.
Where's Dave Chappelle?
I can't wait to go to the Brazillian Steakhouse, want to come?
I'm finna play The Sims 2.
I'm hungry.

Sidekick!

2009-03-09T15:38:00.001-04:00

Ahhhh I love the dance and I'm going to learn it today! The song will grow on me later, I'm sure. Lol

Watch Sidekick videos and dance lessons at DanceJam.com

Echo?

2009-03-09T02:30:00.003-04:00

SOTB: Day26 - So Good ♥

I'm sorry, please tell me if I'm crazy.

So today I'm outwith an acquaintance in Silver Spring, he wants to order take-out from Red Lobster, I'm cool with that cause my friend works there. So I'm there chit chatting with my friend when she has to handle some business, and this acquaintance holds his bill and goes, "Here you go you got this." No, not in a joking manner but like a, "for real give me the money" face.

Had me standing in Red Lobster like, "You must be crazy." So I take a step back and say to myself I say, "Self, he's an acquaintance, it's not that serious. Don't kirk, just be polite so that he'll realize he's being a loose booty hole." So I go, "So I guess (his job) isn't paying you well? I'll cover if you don't have any money." In the most polite voice ever, BUT the bartender (a dude) and the two dudes sitting next to him, looked at him like

"Ah! This fool, poor!" And I'm not even exaggerating. His face looked hurt and he chuckled and said, "*Mcch* can't take a joke? I'm straight."

So then my friend comes back to chat and he goes, "EH-EM!" I realize, yes I'm being a tad rude and I introduce them. Two minutes...TWO MINUTES later we leave Red Lobster and he bumps into some friends (2 girls, 1 guy) and is bunned up with one of the girls. So I'm standing there smiling and say hi to the other two, carrying on small talk and the other girl goes, "Hi (stanky face)." So of course I had to kill her with the kindness and I said, "Wow, your haircut is so gorgeous. But how are you today?" You know the charm killed her and she was all on my NUTS that I don't have.

(Sigh) I win again. So then we continue on our way, he gets a text from the friends (who I think said wonderful things about me) and he goes, "Ugh, don't say hi to my friends!" Homie, why you mad? I've been nothing but nice to you and your friends so it ain't my fault they like me! Sh-t!

I know some might be thinking, "Jo, why are you wasting your time with an acquaintance, someone that you sound like you don't even like."

Well, you're right. I don't know why I put up with it today. Well I actually do, but it's bout to sound shallow like sh-t.

See what happened was, I hadn't seen him in a LONG time like since round the first time I met him, so I didn't remember if he was cute or not so I thought let me go catch up with him and see. Plus I got to see my friends.

And no, he WASN'T.

*Stanky Face*

Sticking To My Promise

2009-03-07T23:36:00.002-05:00

I've already vowed not to bash men any longer, cause I realize it doesn't help the situation and no 2 men are like (and it's VICE VERSA for females). But one cat really just disappointed me tonight and it brought me 5 steps back.

I had to sit, assess the situation, vent, get opionions and drink on it. I've finally reached my conclusion and I'm ok.

To no one I'm not that special somebody but to everyone I am special, and I got to accept that for now.

Sooner or later I'll bump into the right one, but I definitely have not been looking. But this one guy has been around for 7 years and we're still where we at on the first day.

Not any longer, I've let go and let God on this. I don't need him just as much as he don't need me. I'm not mad, but I don't want to waste his space/time and I'm not trying have nothing of mine wasted either.

At least my textbooks never cheat on me. Hahaha.

*Smirnoff Watermelon is really strong, what do you think?

I Have You To Thank Fellas :)

2009-03-06T00:20:00.005-05:00

SOTB: The Dream - Walking On The Moon (feat. Kanye West) ♥♥
Mood: Tired

Gavin Degraw's recent single, "I Have You To Thank" made me do some thinking today as I'm walking in between classes.

Here's a snippet of lyrics so you can see where I'm going with this.

"I have you to thank for making me so
So hard to please because you treated me so
Good that no one else could hold your make-up
Because of you girl I never want to break up."

So for any of you who couldn't decipher, allow me. He's basically saying thank you to this girl who's treated him so good and made him HARD to please that no other girl can come close to her. Basically that he won't SETTLE for just any average joint cause he knows what it feels like to get that SPECIAL stuff. :)

So now back to why I'm thanking all the guys in my life. All the REAL guys whether it be friends or boys who have pursued me, it's really all because of you that I KNOW what I want in a guy, I want a guy that can reflect all the great qualities that my good male counterparts have.

Essentially, is why I have not and will not SETTLE.

I know I'm not the sh-t, I know I don't even come close, but the way that the guy pals in my life treat make me feel like I deserve so much, and I really want to thank you all.

I noticed I have these habits because of guys:

I wear sweats a lot, cause I feel like guys will approach me or chill with me or if I'm one of them instead of some dress. Plus he won't be spending all his energy trying to get under or look underneath it. :]
I minimize my cursing, it's not ladylike and guys notice and they don't like it. The look on their face when I do curse is just priceless.
I keep it 120% and I don't like to gossip. When I'm around my guy friends they don't ever gossip, "Yo, you hear how XYZ cheated on his girl?" Nope, not never. I respect that so much.

So THANK you to all guys I have in my life! You guys keep my head on straight, keep me in check, and help me re-focus my focus. Not necessarily DIRECTLY or INTENTIONALLY but it's because of ya'll that I do.

:)

If This World Were Mine

2009-02-28T23:09:00.008-05:00

Chris And Rihanna have been the most gossiped Drama King & Queen for the past month in all of our households and right now I'm starting to think, this is all a GIMMICK.

Click Here to read the article, it reports the same information all other articles are

Yes, a gimmick. Either they did this all for show/publicity or Rihanna clearly is suffering from a severe/extreme disorder.

So you mean to tell me, Chris abused you, fled the scene, you called the po's on him, he's facing jail time, the picture surfaced on the net, and everyone knows....and you go BACK to him?
(I know it must be good but it can't be that good!)

Jesus Christ you're on some strong crack! (Her father did crack, so maybe she does too).
(effects of crack, i.e. her father)

I mean it just doesn't make too much sense.

Chris, you allegedly held a meeting between yourself and all your family and close friends and announced the END of you and Rihanna and basically declared that you needed to stay a free man and everyone needs to look out for you, their "homeboy".

Like what the hell is going on? At this point I really feel like Rihanna, FUCK YOU and Chris, FUCK YOU and let you all deal with it. It's way to much sh-t. I mean I really didn't want to be all up on the info/gossip in the first place cause I thought the situation was serious/personal (domestic violence isn't a joke), but Chris & Ri are basically making this some kind of comedy show.

( hell yeah gram'ma.)

I for one am not taking Rihanna or Chris Brown seriously any longer. You can't tell me that, Chris beat it up like gorillas on you you pressed charges, he might go to jail, the pictures came online, he's going to plead for self-defense and you guys are back together. It all makes NO sense. None whatsoever.

Rihanna and Chris Brown, I hope your music goes down the drain. Hope you don't make a dime. Ya'll definitely won't be collecting any of MY money (not like either of you ever DID).

Go back to school. Go get a degree. You're "star" value depreciated to less than recycled pig sh-t to me.

Go sell MEDICINE b-tches! Do SOMETHING!

No actually, go take care of your FAMILY, Rihanna, the hell is your pops doing? Can you buy him a home? And wire him money so he doesn't have to do this? This'll hopefully be you this time next year if no one buys your CDs (I hope).

Heavy Rotation

2009-02-26T13:56:00.001-05:00

1. Rihanna - Hatin' On The Club ♥ ♥ ♥
2. Ne-Yo - Stupid For You ♥ ♥ ♥
3. Ne-Yo - Common Sense ♥ ♥ ♥
4. T-Pain - Snap Yo Fingaz ♥ ♥
5. Nikko Smith - Next Ex Girlfriend ♥ ♥ ♥
6. Dream - Best I Ever Had ♥ ♥
7. The Dream - Walking On The Moon ♥ ♥ ♥
8. 50 Cent - Do What It Do (feat. R. Kelly) ♥ ♥
9. Drake - Bria's Interlude (feat. Omarion) ♥ ♥ ♥
10. Robin Thicke - Dreamworld ♥
♥ J0SMILES ツ

Laughing Out Loud

2009-02-24T16:26:00.004-05:00

SOTB: Ne-Yo - Common Senson ♥♥♥

So I'm reading the news online like I often do. And I couldn't help but to ponder on this article!

Missing Teacher, Teen Student Found

A Massachusetts schoolteacher, Lisa Lavoie, 24, is behind bars on a kidnapping charge in West Virginia on Tuesday after police found her at a motel with a 15-year-old boy whose parents had complained about the relationship. So these two were getting down, and I'm not for it, but hey 15 year old guys got it on their mind to. "Baby I need your loving, GOT to have ALL your loving."
But what made me just shake my head is what is reported later on in the article...

"Goodnight would not reveal where the boy had been taken but said arrangements are being made to send him home. The eighth-grader will be interviewed by child welfare officials, then reunited with his family. The teen showed "no outward signs of physical abuse" when he was found, Sullivan said."

So he's a 15 year old in the EIGHTH grade?! He's a big ass boy, he's knows all this 8th grade sh-t! THAT'S why he went out looking to get her loving. DUH! The stupid school system fails another child again!

Manic Monday

2009-02-24T00:11:00.001-05:00

As I'm playing The Sims Double Deluxe (yes I'm an addict but ya'll love
coffee, soda, feet and God knows what else, so you got no room to judge
me!) I realized that I hate when a guy assumes that he could have me IF
he wanted to. Uh heh---nah playa! If only you could view my mindset. 93%
of you guys might think cause you got dreads, spend every friday @ LOVE,
wear AX or push Caddies could have me when you're so wrong. I RARELY
find myself ATTRACTED and MOVED by a guy. Now, of course I find males
attractive and good-looking but it don't come close to meaning I'd let
you breathe on my neck let alone I'd want to pursue any kind of
relationship with you (from being the girl you try to beat to wifey
#1-3). So I'd love if every guy got this memo and stop looking at me the
way they do.

Ummmm so Chris sent Rihanna an iPod, diamond necklace and earrings for
her birthday...and she's loving it. It don't take much to please her,
maybe we all do need to wait until they talk about what really happened.
Cause if she's ready to forgive either Chris is REALLY working something
RIGHT so she couldn't quit even if she wanted to or she's just another
dumb girl. To have your picture of you being battered and bruised by a
guy and then run back to him? I got no reason to defend or support
you...none.

On to a better note, I love Rihanna's new song: Hatin' On The Club, I
hope its a single. ♥

I'm totally in love with some____ (one or thing) that I can't have.
Wooooah you got me hatin' on the club;cause you took my love;why'd you
have to take my love.

♥ J0SMILES ツ

I've Noticed That...

2009-02-23T01:21:00.003-05:00

SOTB: Rihanna - Hatin' On The Club (New) ♥♥
Mood: Studious

-its still february, yet this is the shortest out of 12 months
-in md the weather has fluctuated from 60° to snowing hard the next
day
-supposedly rihanna and chris are still together...no words
-apparently usher's wife tameka foster was revived within minutes after
suffering cardiac arrest and was induced into a coma, and the media
totally under-exposed it cause of the whole "take you down" match with
chris & ri
-there's actually people out there who watch me (for example) like their
favorite tv show. and even though they swear up and down they hate me
and this & that is wack about me, they secretly want to be me.
-heath ledger's daughter is her father's daughter, I mean spinning image!
-people say this will be the end of chris brown's career and if it turns out to be then I need to know what's changed? wesley snipes along with a professional mlb player both beat the hell out of halle and bothcontinued successful careers. mike tyson (he's a winner in any ring) beat all life out of robin givens and he got 3 years and also became a household name with prob. a bigger fan base than before!
-why did my dad just wake me up to ask if I left the dryer on!!!
(irritated)
-where in the world is dave chappelle? :(
-i don't like pancakes.
-i do the most nicest and out of the way things for others and I don't
like/want to.
-i probably have a mild case of ocd
-im really good in math & science, but hate both
-thinks that you dumb as hell (to:guys) if you think I believe anything
you say to me within the first 1 hr of meeting and knowing you.
-realized that most likely you probably don't have the attention span or
capacity to have reach the end.

Say;it;with;your: actions.

♥ J0SMILES ツ

Chris Brown Exposéd AIM conversation

2009-02-20T00:28:00.001-05:00

This took place on AIM between my BFF L and I. He's one of Rihanna's
admirers/crushes/husbands/misters/partners.

Claimer: Damn Chris, how can anyone look out for you? SMH.

---------------------------------------- 10:58 pm
----------------------------------------
j0smiles: U saw the pics?
j0smiles: Bff for your sake
j0smiles: Don't look
j0smiles: Please
---------------------------------------- 12:16 am
----------------------------------------
Steven: WHERE ARE THE PICS!!!!!!!!!!!!
j0smiles: Steven
j0smiles: Please
j0smiles: I love you immensely
j0smiles: Like rabbits love carrots
Steven: where aer the muthafuckin pics
j0smiles: Like frogs love flies
Steven: im breathing hard as shit right now
j0smiles: Don't do it to yourself!!!!
Steven: i love you too
Steven: where aer the pics
j0smiles: Lololol
Steven: i love u too
j0smiles: www.tmz.com
Steven: where aer the pics
Steven: ima fuckin feed chris muthafuckin pussy ass doodoo brown his own
mutha fuckin testicles
Steven: ima fuckin pull his lungs out shove them so far back up his ass
he can breathe again
Steven: o my muthafuckin g
j0smiles: Lol
Steven: om muthafuckin g
j0smiles: I know I know
j0smiles: :-(
Steven: i wanna fuck something up right now
j0smiles: I'm anti chris brown
Steven: i wanna fuck something up right now
j0smiles: He's been blacklisted
Steven: this is my boo!!!!!!!
Steven: look at her!!!!!
j0smiles: I'm going to suggest that he goes to community college to get
an education
Steven: oh my fuck
j0smiles: He officially ended his own career
Steven: im done
Steven: lol oh man
Steven: lol
Steven: ooooooh man
Steven: lol
j0smiles: Bow Wow & Soulja Boy happppppy as shit now
j0smiles: They can be on the come up with him gone
Steven: lolololololmao
j0smiles: Oh man
Steven: omg i just wanna hold my boo and make her know its gon be aight
j0smiles: Lolol
Steven: omg ima fuck him up
j0smiles: She's in barbados she's good money
Steven: no homo ima "take him down"
Steven: asap
j0smiles: Oh my goodness doesn't Canada still take refugees?
j0smiles: Lololol
j0smiles: Lololololol
Steven: im fuck him up
Steven: ima feed him a bullet sammich yo
j0smiles: Hahaha
j0smiles: Sammmmich
j0smiles: Yo
Steven: omg........his ass will be redskinned when im done
Steven: fuck lightskinned
Steven: omg
j0smiles: Lol
j0smiles: Mm mm mm
Steven: i wana fuckin.................UUUGGGHHHHH!!!
j0smiles: I know
j0smiles: We'll just send him to Canada
j0smiles: Man I kinda wish bush were still in office
j0smiles: He'd know what to do to Chris
Steven: fuck that send him to mercury
j0smiles: Like the ultimate punishment
j0smiles: THAT'S IT!
j0smiles: We'll send him to IRAQ!
Steven: i wanna see his skin boil in mercury's atmosphere
Steven: fuck that they gon be too nicei want his ass in mars gettin
raped by martians
Steven: fuck him
j0smiles: Lolol

♥ J0SMILES ツ

This Is A True Story

2009-02-18T22:40:00.002-05:00

I went to school today.
Handled some situations and was on my way to class when all of a sudden...

Him: Shhhiiiiiiiiiiit! Wa-wa-wait! Hold up! Damn, what's your name? Shit, can I have a hug? Damn, you're so beautiful. And you fine.
Me: [blank] What?
Him: Hi, how you doing? Can I have a hug, you're just so beautiful.
Me: [laughing] I'm fine, how are you?
[Walking and talking]
Him: I'm good, can I have a hug please? Please.
Me: Umm, ok?
[Hugs]
Him: Oh my God... What's your name? Can I get your number? I mean I know you got a boyfriend but shit let me be your friend.
Me: Uh.... you can be my friend, I'll see you 'round campus.
Him: Ok, but can I get your number?
[Reached my building and he's still following]
Me: I mean I don't really know you...
Him: I know! Let me get to know you, give me your number?
Me: Um, maybe another time I'm going to class.
[He holds the door(s)]
Him: When will I see you again? Shiiit you're beautiful, I know you got all the dudes like this.
Me: Um...
[At the door of my class]
Me: Bye
Him: Is your professor cool? I'll sit and wait for you and we can get to know each other.

Then, by this point my professor helps me slam the door in his face when a classmate shoves him out.

That was really, really weird.

I Found A Dream That I Could Speak To

2009-02-18T14:35:00.003-05:00

SOTB: Charlie Wilson - Live Without You ♥♥♥

Wow, Charlie Wilson is like a beast. I've loved Charlie Wilson since... dang I can't even remember cause he always used to be featured in so many songs. But damn, he's like one of the most slept on R&B/Soul artists forreal. His voice is great and I haven't heard a song from him that didn't GET to me. I was listening to my "Yep his name is Charlie" playlist on my iPod, and it seriously made me want to just sing. I think he helped me find my smile again. :)

Oil + Water Don't Mix

2009-02-15T20:39:00.003-05:00

SOTB:Mint Condition - Someone To Love ♥♥♥
Mood - Frustrated

ok i need ya'll to know i'm looking for this one thing first and foremost and it has to be full-functioning and powerful:

because if a man has this then everything falls neatly into place afterwards.

I'd also like my guy to look like this:

than like this:

that's just me! But as long as you have the first picture as I describe it really don't matter what you look like.

No it's not about

The Money
The Clothes
The Car
The Perfect Good Looks

It's about

Can you take care of yourself?
Do you see yourself being better than you already are now in 5 years?
If you lose your job, do you have a plan or are you hoping to depend on me?
Can you settle down and take care of yourself + a family?

That's where the line is drawn to. That's it right there, the whole kit-kaboodle. And fellas, ya'll need to be thinking the SAME exact thing when you look for your girl. I hope you'd want a girl with a FULL-FUNCTIONING and POWERFUL brain/mind. And prefer a woman who is classy and presents herself in a lady-like manner than rocking checker scarves and skinny jeans/leggings all day everyday.

*Note: Scarves are cute, skinny jeans are bomb, and hell leggings are comfortable. But there's just appropriate times for appropriate clothing. At a grown and sexy lounge/club party I don't want to see you wearing your saggy jeans with your timbs and fitteds that I see all the time during the week. :(

If what I'm saying to you is nonsense than either: 1) it's your prerogative do what you want 2) you are biologically/mentally too young or 3) you're settling for less than what you deserve.

Take them apples!

PS: The head of the Chemistry department is trying to hinder my dream and process of getting into UMBC and I am going to pray that the Lord shows him the light. That is ALL! HMPH!

She Speaks!

2009-02-09T23:50:00.003-05:00

sotb: nikko smith - next ex-girlfriend ♥♥
mood: moved

males: stop asking me do i have a valentine. i don't nor do i need. unless you bout to bring me a cheesesteak (with everything on it) from the carry-out, i suggest you go that way!

females: stop getting caught in the hype. february 14 is just that, february 14. this hype is a poor excuse for anyone to wake up and finally appreciate anyone they love. everyone should be making whoever they love feel special everyday! i don't want a guy who's going to pull out all the stops for me on 2/14. i want a guy who will love me his own way everyday. ☺

chris, now why did you have to do that? that's all i can really say. and rihanna, i'm kinda shocked and a smidge disappointed you couldn't hold your own. i'm just saying, if it was a haitian girl, would've been a wrap. i wish a n*gga would escalate an argument with me outside the car. hmph! mccccchhhhh.

also today i realized why people are drawn to me and like me. or actually someone pointed it out for me. i'm REAL. i say what i mean and i mean what i say. i admit when i'm wrong and i know when i'm right. i'm not scared of no one or any thing unless it pertains 100% G-O-D and eternal damnation in hell. some call it "being cool", others say "real down to earth", all along i really thought it was just me being who I am.

anyways, has anyone, other than Gaby and I, been following The Secret Life of the American Teenager? That is my sh*t. Tonight was just amazing and I can not wait for next week!

I also can't wait for Spring and 60° weather. I'm now further motivated to move to Cali or Georgia.

ok, i'm done.

I Didn't Think It Would Go Like This, But...

2009-02-08T22:10:00.002-05:00

SOTB: Tina Turner - What's Love Got To Do With It
Mood: Satisfied :)

Well, as some may know, I have a big real-life crush on Christopher Maurice Brown aka Chris Brown.

And yes I'm well aware of his association to R&B/Pop singer, Robyn Rihanna Fendy aka Rihanna.

But, I want everyone to know that ever since day 1 when the circulations started, that I've said whatever RELATIONSHIP they do have, would SURELY end.

I also said that it would be Rihanna leaving Chris.

Soooooo, I just happened to find this and I want you to have a field day.

Click Here For Article #1

Click Here For Article #2

Goodnight ;)

PS. I love you Chris! But I ain't no Tina. OR Anna Mae. I'll beat the shit out of you if you....I love you though.

Haven't You Heard?

2009-01-31T00:16:00.006-05:00

Song of the Post: Ne-Yo - What You Do ♥
Current Mood: Giddy

Haha, for all that caught my last blog, lemme update you all.

Homeboy heard the WORD about his 5 minutes of fame on my page and for some reason deleted all his Facebook, MySpace, etc. pages. Guess he realized he had to get rid of some [de]vices huh? Oh, simple b-tch. But on to FUN stuff :)

Well about 2 months ago I got tagged to do a 25 Facts Note on Facebook where you had to jot down 25 fun facts about yourself and tag others in it, and I want to do it again on here [new ones though]. So I'm going to get into that, if you find yourself reading my blog, please make a 25 facts about yourself and write me a comment letting me know so I can check it out, I feel like people write like the BEST stuff in it.

Well, here goes!

My nickname Jo Smiles/J0SMILES/Smiles was given to me in high school by a guy, and it just spread like California wildfires.
I'm bad at pretending like I'm listening/care, I either scrinch my face up while you're talking to me like I'm in pain or I'll pay attention to any and everything around me [been told this].
I don't drink soda or pretty much anything else, only sweet tea and roasted dandelion root tea [I don't know].
I really want to have a baby like really bad, but I'm EXTRA single and NOWHERE near marriage oh and I'm BROKE like shit, so I don't know how that's going to work. Oh and I'm still a member and Maryland Chapter President of the V-Club, how could I forget?
I always keep socks on, always.
When hanging out with friends, I actually say the stuff that everyone's thinking aloud, cause I'm not really up to code on what and when is right to say anything.
I [still] hate on Rihanna even though I gave up my celebrity crush on Chris Brown and I know most of her songs, they're seriously on my iPod...most played like shit.
I'm way too nice, I offer to do things even sometimes when I actually don't want to, just cause, it's the nice and right thing to do.
I cross the street without looking 97% of the time and I expect cars to yield and halt. What is Jay Walking?
I always wonder about the lives of those youthful people who work at McDonald's. Like, do they go out and say, "Hey Ya'll I got a job at Mickey D's! Free hash browns and sweet tea for everyone!" Like, do they still have friends? I'm really trying to know, this is serious.
I hold grudges (not that petty stuff like you asked Jordan to prom when you knew I liked him) for ever. I forgive and all that, but once you fuck up with me, that's it. Kaput. Never ever never ever again.
Unlike most girls I know, I do not like the following: trying on clothes at the mall, the movie Love & Basketball, eating ice cream when I'm sad/angry and chocolate (there are exceptions: twix)
I sleep with a pillow between my legs, very bad habit.

I can't think of anything else fun so I will continue at my discretion. :)

What Do You Mean Am I Done? I'm Only Getting Started!

2009-01-28T12:42:00.006-05:00

Whew. Ok here's a mini-series blog that I will be starting. It's called, "What Do..." oh just refer to the blog title because it's too long to type over again, but anyways...

So in these series I will be most likely roasting and putting on blast a very stupid, dumb and retarded male [or female]. It's not a daily thing but you'll know when I'm doing it by the title :)

Today's victim?

[Drum Roll]

Antonio T. Greene

No, I have no qualms or guilt about his name up for everyone to see, cause I just don't care! For the record he never was or will be someone important in my life, so if his feelings or reputation is hurt then oh well! It's his stupid, dumb and retarded self fault!

Anyways... So this guy we started out as friends and I was PERFECTLY content with that. Someone to call, to text and it was all cool and lovely. Then he starts asking for pictures, so of course I send him CLEAN stuff only. Stuff you'd find on my Facebook (we weren't friends on it) or MySpace. He sends me pictures, ok cool. But then I got tired of it, and it played out as such..

Him: I think you should start sending me MORE when you send pictures.
Me: Why do you always ask me to send you pictures?
Him: I'm a man, so of course I want to see sometimes.
Me: But you're not MY man so...and I don't send pictures like that, if you want to see stuff go hit up the other girls you talk to
Him: [Grunt] [Sigh] [Huff] Here we go...
Me: No seriously, it's not like I care. You can do the hell you want to! I ain't your girl! You not my man!
Him: Ok, but I'm not that kind of guy. No girl likes me cause they think I'm weird.
Me: Mhm, sure.

Then he starts sendind me explicit stuff and I'm TURNED off. I make jokes out of them but I really don't like it. First off you're disrespecting yourself, second-disrespecting me. I don't need or WANT to see your dick. Cause you're dick don't do NOTHING for me.

I know right, Halle? Eww!

Let's backtrack a little...

When I first started talking to him [as friends] I told my really close friend about him. How he used to call/text often as if he was interested, but I told her I was not at all interested, she asked for a picture and I delivered and I was shocked and she was by what happened next...

Her: OMG....
Me: What? WHAT?
Her: I know that nigga, I had sex with hiiiim :(.
Me: Aww man.
Her: I mean I'd only tell you to get with him if you were sexually active and looking for some good dick, but other than that stay AWAY JoJo!
Me: No problem!!!!

Ask them again Julie! My girl!!!

So then later on that same night I ask him about her and the n-gga had AMNESIA!!! I mean STRAIGHT bumped his head and can't remember a THING! So I'm like yeah ok.... I ain't stupid but you can keep on you still ain't getting SHIT from me!

So it's roughly 3 months since we've been "friends" but I reduced him to a mere aqcquaintance cause I really ain't give a shit about him since I knew in my mind he ain't give a shit about me. And this dude gone start telling me he's into God, he's been saved, he's had a hard life, I won't understand him. So I try to find out more so maybe I can understand why he is the way he is, but all he conveyed to me is. His parents weren't there for him, he had horrible asthma, he's extra super on his God. Which is plausible but isn't no excuse for all the stuff he does.

You're a LIAR sweetie. I'm sorry. Here's your divine intervention! You lie about how many girls you talk to. You lie about your relationship with God. You lie about your everyday life. You just LIE!

I wouldn't even THINK of getting with you if I was being paid a G every 30 minutes.

So let's sum up all of Antonio's faults so he can be thrown into the vault shall we?

Told me you have a job with AT&T : LIE, you got fired!
Told me you had a strict court order allowing you to go to and from work : LIE you ain't got no job! And from my understanding... NO CAR!
You are a God-fearing man : LIE the way you treat women makes you JUST like the rest of the other dogs that are out there!
You don't talk to girls like everyone thinks you do, you aren't some ladies man : LIE I know about 3+ girls that you've talked to that I'm cool with you DUMB B-TCH
You had the hardest life : LIE Come on, A LOT of people have had HARD LIVES and who the fuck BRAGS about it?

Antonio T. Greene, you've just been started.

*This message has been approved and supported by smart women and men everywhere.

End of the 1st -Uary

2009-01-26T13:39:00.000-05:00

January has come and gone. So much went on that I'm GLAD is over with.

Inauguration

I was just as happy about the next American about the event, but people just roadkill -ed it. First off all TV stations were following it, and I just kept hearing stupid information I didn't need to know, and I just got inaug -ed out. I'm happy that it's over and done with and everyone is safe. Now we can move on to bigger and greater things.

Immobility

I've been without my car for 2 whole months and it sucked so bad. It felt like I was a 7 mos old baby that could walk but people keep picking me up all the time so I never got a chance to. But finally, Midnight is back in my care, under my name and I have to pay for him. =\ & =)

Vacation (School-Wise)

I love lounging, being lazy, not having sh-t to do. But I mean I need school, it adds events in my life. I meet people at school everyday and it's something to do! Plus, I need and want to finish up with school as soon as possible! The closer I am to graduation day, the closer I am to making over 100K a year.... HOLLA!

But yeah, I don't have anything EXCITING for everyone today, but what I can say is that I will be doing more of the following in future blogs, so get ready for all the new commotion/construction on my page!

Song of the Post: there'll be a new song everytime I make a post, might be a throwback, might be an exclusive, or just a hit that everyone is sleeping on.
Picture-focused blogs: I realize that seeing is better than reading, so I need to get up on my capturing photo game.
Personal blogs: I need it, I was told that the Great Wall ain't got nothing on me. That I'm way too guarded and I need to let access sometimes before I self-destruct.
Video blogs: not too often but I did one before and some actually liked it, not on here or youtube, but it's out there, so yeah.... =)

Well that's all folks!

Interesting

2009-01-16T12:24:00.000-05:00

This isn't my blog for today, but I thought it was interesting enough to share with all my Marylanders. I try to tell everyone that within the next 5 years, Maryland will turn into the new ATL/NYC. They'll be artists (rappers, singers, actors, actresses, etc.) and so much more coming out from our state. This is a great way to start too. :)

Smartest Suburbs + Small Towns

1. Bethesda, Md.

Total Population: 56,842
Advanced degrees: 51.5%
Bachelor's degrees: 29.0%
Associate degrees: 3.8%
Bethesda Homes for Under $250K
Professors from Georgetown, lawmakers from the capital and researchers from the National Institutes of Health give Bethesda, Md., a preponderance of advanced degrees. In fact, the percentage of advanced degrees in Bethesda is more than five times as high as in the entire U.S.

Forbes did the research on this. The smartest town in the United States is in Maryland! Something to be proud of! Somewhere in Massachusetts came 2nd then somewhere in California then somewhere in VA and then Los Angeles was next. Here's the link

Got Me F-cked Up

2009-01-11T00:05:00.000-05:00

Ummmm. Everybody got facebook, right? I mean I have one, I'm sure you do too right? Right...

So what permits a stranger friend requesting me? I know the whole point of facebook is a social-networking tool, but I mean it's at every user's discretion.

For me, my page is totally private. You can't really search and find me easily. And even to contact me you have to add me as a friend first. But I still manage to get at least 10-20 new friend requests every time I log on to facebook.

On top of that I don't really like getting friend requests from people I know that I'm not necessarily cool with.

Now everyone knows me, I'm Jo Smiles. Friendly, outgoing, happy, just fun. But not everyone likes that, and that's cool. I know people who have met me but for their own personal reasons kept it at that and do no speak or make eye contact with me when they see me. And that's fine, do what you does, but why are you adding me on facebook?

I'm not going to message you. I got no pictures of you to tag. I'm not going to leave you any comments, so what are you doing?

That's where people get me confused for the next one. I reject REAL quick. Reject, reject, reject! I think it's actually more courteous than me accepting your add. Cause you know what usually happens next if I was to accept? You accept someone you ain't necessarily friends with, then they spend their life on-line leaving [hate] comments, starting e-beef, writing obscene things in your honesty box and your friends.

I honestly don't see the point of it all. Keep your facebook simple. Find your friends, people who grew up with you, those who lived on your block, went to grade school, highschool or college, etc. And leave it at that. Cause if you f-ck around and try to add me and I don't know you, you just wasted 5 minutes.

*Update 1/11* It's like BK reads my mind. I love them for this! http://www.whoppersacrifice.com/

You Do What You Do Well!

2009-01-10T11:27:00.000-05:00

Gooooooooooooooootdamn! You haters is on your job RIGHT in 2009. You wasn't playing, huh? Upgraded like sh-t from 2008. I ain't ever seen this kind of hate going until now and it's ONLY January! Kudos haters, kudos.

I'm saying haters go hard like it's no one's business. There's been so many f-cked up sh-t that happened this month than in the past 5 years for my circle (network of friends/family/associates).

I imagine that haters work harder than any other occupation out there. What person you know work 24/7? 365? 366 if it's a leap year? 52 weeks? Open all holidays? Nobody! Except a hater.

They work through any and every situation too! Rain, Shine, Sleet, Snow, Fog, Tornado, Hurricane, Global Warming, Recession, Birthdays, Funerals, First of The Month, Winter Cold, Summer's Heat, On a Computer, On a Phone, in a Different State, in a Different Country, I mean WOW. No matter what feat they face, they ON it like some brake lights and do the job 900% CORRECT.

I'm not even mad, I mean get it how you live it? But I wonder.... how much you get paid? Do you guys have families? Are you reimbursed ever for the hard work you put in? Ever get your life or pride back? I'm just wondering....

[Click]

2009-01-08T13:36:00.000-05:00

ok I've dialed a few wrong numbers in my lifetime. Intentional or unitentional, usually the latter. But usually when I do so no matter who it is that picks up, you can be the King of Pop himself, I would say, "Oops I'm sorry, I think I dialed the wrong number." And that's THAT. So, WHY oh WHY I get a call last night around 8pm....

Me: Hello?
Him: Hell-oooo...I'm trying to speak to Chico sweetheart, can you give him the phone?
Me: [Stares at my phone] I'm sorry, you have the wrong number.
Him: Oh do I baby? Mmmm, ok well how you doing tonight?
Me: I'm fine, thanks, ok well goodnight.
Him: Mmmm goodnight indeed baby, I'll holla!
Me: [Click]

So then I'm like, ok clearly he was just trying to be smooth cause he dialed the wrong number. So I'm not tripping.

11pm

Me: Hello?
Him: Hey honey, what's good with you?
Me: Stil dialed the wrong number.
Him: Oh no I was looking for you, I dialed the right one this time!
Me: [Click]

Ok point of the story. NO ONE boy or girl should do that. Do not dial a wrong number and then realize the person you're calling sounds attractive or whatever and call back! That's CREEPY! Don't you DO THAT!

2009-01-06T13:52:00.000-05:00

I love, love, love Nicki Minaj. I mean I have since I heard her Can't Stop, Won't Stop, but I didn't really follow her like that, I slept on her. But I been listening to everything I can find on her, and I respect. No I'm not saying she's hotter than Trina, Kim, Remy Ma, or whoever, but for me, I'm diggin` Nicki.

I don't understand in 2oo9.

2009-01-03T18:44:00.000-05:00

Why do guys try to talk to girls and do it in such an aggressive way? They try to do the most to get you to believe they want to get to know you (and only you) and make you their #1. They tell you you're the only girl that makes them feel that way and you're the only one they talking this talk to.

But...he's talking to plenty other girl (As he should, I'm not hating).

I just don't know why you guys do that. I'm not mad, no. Do you, you're not my boyfriend and I'm not your girlfriend, but why you lying? Just tell me, "You look good, I'm trying to date you, and get to know you. I'm not trying to be your man though, I'm not trying to trap you up and put a title on us. But maybe if we talk a little more we can see where it takes us."

I'd rather hear that than all that other s@!& I've already heard.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Why do people RUSH/PUSH to get on the bus? For the past month, I've been using the Metro (which isn't that bad) and I noticed this at bus stops/stations. I mean the bus has more than enough seats for everyone but they push and shove when that pulls up. I just don't understand? Don't you push me though, cause I'll cuss you the f@($ out. You gone push me, for a d*#& seat on the bus? Got me bent.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Why am I just finding out that Drake goes hard?

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Why am I still single? As much as everyone else has been shocked for the past 2 years, I am beginning to not understand this either...

--------------------------------------------------------------------
Why am I only 20 years and I act much older than a 27 year old man? What's wrong with that you ask?

I still live at home. He does not. Grow up.
I'm still in school. You are not. Grow up.
I pay my own bills. Your parents send you money to pay your expenses/bills.
I don't get mad when you don't call or text me back during the day cause I understand you work. You leave me voicemails saying that I'm acting childing when I don't answer your calls (cause I'm at WORK or SCHOOL).
I told you that it might be best for us to be remain friends. You beg and plead for me to give you a chance.

SMH

--------------------------------------------------------------------

These are some things I'm not understanding in 2009.

Clogged Drain

2008-12-25T00:05:00.000-05:00

*Advisory*
The following is release. I've been clogged since May 2006 and tonight on December 25, 2008, I'm getting it all out. I'm not depressed, I'm not sad, I'm not hurting, this is just me touching a part that I haven't used in a while....enjoy (?)

It feels like an airbag imploding when there's no accident. A bouncy ball that never stops bouncing. The favorite chew toy your dog Spike likes to bite. But it's ok, it's been through worse. It feels like it's been sealed tight for hundreds of years with a lock, but no key. A safe box, icebox, same thing. I used to remember what it looked like when it was brand new, but I just say what she says or he says when someone asks what's new. It's red and I got all the pieces still in tact, been real careful with it. Funny how I can't mention how it acts up. When I can't feel my hands. And the sun is blue. Or how the noise went away. I honestly don't know how long it'll keep up. I got no warranty or insurance on it either, I was told it was strong and pure, whatever that means. Sometimes I wonder what like would be like without it, the constant clogging. The clutter. The bruises and bleeding. I thought it stopped before, but today it kicked. It kicked... Heart we got some work to do. If I'm ever to give you away again, I got to get ALL your pieces back together, get your condition BRAND new. Someone out there knows how to hold you the right way and knows where to put you, better than I. Just got to be patient, heart.

1:43AM

2008-12-21T01:43:00.000-05:00

Life is too short. People don't understand.
One thing that disappoints me is how people compare and compete their woes.

"Man, I been working 9 hours a day, everyday this week!"
"That's it? I been working 12 hour shifts everyday this week."

What? Since when is it cool, to battle out your misfortunes? Whoever is most misfortunate wins what? My pity?

No...everyone's misfortunes is just that...their OWN. What's a struggle for you might not be for someone else and vice versa. People go through their own all the time, and we all need to be forever grateful for the things most of us don't have to worry about. (I.E. place to live, food, family, friends, job, health, etc.)

Life is short, ya'll. You got to do what you got to do. If you don't want to, then you must not really want or need it.

My haiku for today.

I smile and I laugh
I cry and I hurt, is it
Simple, which came first?

Do you hear me?

2008-12-17T01:34:00.000-05:00

How I feel summed up in some haiku, I like writing them, but these aren't mine. I will post mine next blog.

Governor Blago
Takes corruption to new heights
Drags states to new depths

Words chiseled in stone.
Promises as good as gold.
In the end, just lies

Please answer, she sobs.
Where is this going? What hope?
I haven't a clue.

Rotten Egg

2008-12-13T21:40:00.000-05:00

I'm currently making my X-MAS wish lists for the following stores

American Apparel
Forever 21
New York & Co.
A|X
Up Against The Wall
Target/Best Buy/Circuit-City (Electronics)

I'll let you guys know the tally up =)

I'll leave you guys with my jam, Solange - T.O.N.Y., been rocking this since the summer, and it's a single now so happy!

2008-12-08T12:25:00.000-05:00

Name of the Year is... Joe!

Say I'm lying! Say my name Jo(e) three times and act like one of us won't show up

Average guy Joe, Joe the lumberjack, Joe Six-pack, Amtrak Joe Biden, and, of course, Joe The Plumber.

You can't FADE like we ain't HOT!

We Can't Be Mad At God.

2008-12-07T19:59:00.000-05:00

Andre 3000 is my truth.

"If we happen to part, (Lord knows I don't want that!) we can't be mad at God. We met today for a reason, I think I'm on the right track now."

Hey, I'm back. Been busy with school and work. Got 2 more weeks left and the pressure is [dead] on. I can't slip up on anything.

I'll be back with something interesting later.

P.S. The Drought is Over Part 6: The Reincarnation, sucks.

:]

OK...What?!

2008-10-31T18:15:00.000-04:00

Ok, what is going on.
I just realized that I can't recall the last time something REALLY good happened to me.
Or maybe this is a test? Maybe I'm ungrateful (for having my life and my loved ones).
Or maybe this is horrible KARMA?
What did I do? I must have really f-cked up someone or something.

First off, my brother decides RIGHT before I go out to Fright Fest for Halloween that he's coming over NOW to pick up his car. Ok....

Then the $20 I had to my name to go out to the movies was taken by my mother to satisfy her habit of buying clothes (in sizes other than her own) that are on sale, so I can't go to the movies. Ok...

My aunt in Dominican Republic has died unexpectedly and the little family she had around her (husband, daughters, sons) have requested a LARGE amount of money. Now, as bad as this may sound, what does LARGE QUANTITIES of money have to do with the DECEASED? I'm talking money that exceeds the funeral arrangements limit.

To top it ALL off, McDonald's is taking OFF the double cheeseburger and replacing it with the McDouble. WTF They're doing this because with the McDouble it will be one LESS slice of cheese and exactly $.06 less to make.

I feel disrespect, upset, angry, appalled. Everything. I don't know what I did to deserve any of this.

People Are F-cked Up

2008-10-22T22:40:00.000-04:00

Ok so it's been roughly 2 weeks at my new job. And needless to say, I absolutely love it! Great staff, nothing but POSITIVITY, and it involves MINIMAL critical thinking (thumbs up). But to the nitty gritty...I don't want to give to much away (even though I kind of did with my last post), but I work for a promotional/marketing company. Basically I walk around trying to get people to sign up for FREE stuff. Yes, I get paid if someone signs up for something FREE. So ultimately, everyone is happy. You don't spend any money, you are just awared (is that a word?) of something completely FREE with no obligation [to buy] for anything. And I get paid since I did my job of promoting and marketing. WELL, this consists me of actually GREETING potential customers and being courteous. And I really don't find being nice to someone hard. It's actually a sincerely and genuinely easy thing for me to do. Cause real talk, I'd want someone to be nice to me too. I walk around smiling at others, greeting people, and even asking, "How are you?", and sometimes I usually do this without asking them to sign up for anything. But I've noticed along the way, people are fucked up. I say this cause in 2008, you can not walk up to someone 10 out of 10 times, say hello with a big smile on your face and expect the same thing back. No.... Here are some reactions I've acquired from the following statement/greeting, both positive and negative.

"Hello. How are you today?"

1. Who are you? [Angry face]
2. Vigorous shaking of the head.
3. Oh God! [Person storms off in opposite direction]
4. I really don't care what you're trying to say, so don't waste my time.
5. Hi.
6. [Ignore]

I talk to on average probably 80+ people a day and I generally hear 1.-4. 90% of the time. And I hate to say it, but on average I see more of a reflection of the population, so I see probably 90% white people. But still I see Asians, African-Americans, Hispanics/Latinos, and Other(s) too, and they are fucked up as well. All I got to say it, you (all) need to get your shit together, for real. Why is it so crazy that I smile at you and want to see how you're going? Will it kill you to be nice back? Do you know what being nice even is?

I think I'm going to have to do some research on what country is actually the "nicest" cause I sure don't want my children growing up in this country. Where they'll be looked at as unusual or weird because they will be friendly, happy, and smile at others.

People are FUCKED up!

If This Is It, Please Let Me Know

2008-10-13T16:12:00.000-04:00

Not only is just daily living and survival hard, but so is a lot in my life. It's crazy, I always answer, "I'm great. I'm fine!" when someone asks how are you. Because you know what, compared to a lot of other people. I have a home, I have clothes, I have a family, my parents are together (married for 18 years, together for 26), everyone is in good health, etc. I am so thankful for all of it and couldn't imagine any of it being taken away from me. I don't ever want to have to be in comparison with someone and say, "...Well I got it worse than you do. My life is miserable." No, that's not cool and I don't want to argue with someone over who has the worst going for them. Even though my life is going better than those who have no home, no family, can't find a reason/purpose for living--I feel like the past couple of months my life has just been sinking lower and lower than I thought it could.
On August 22nd, I was planning on going out. It was the Friday of the week I had just got back from my family vacation, my dad was on his way to work and my mom was already at work. It was about 2:40pm or so, when I got a phone call from my mom's job saying she had an accident and was in the hospital. I don't really want to get to deep into it, but ultimately we found out my mother has growing a tumor in her head, but she's still here and I'm thankful for that. My dad, although we haven't been the best of friends since I hit about 13, he's still my dad and I love him. He goes through a daily fight trying to stay healthy. He has high blood pressure, high cholesterol, he isn't allowed to eat over HALF the things that I'd QUICKLY inhale in a second, he has a chronic back pains that sometimes causes him to be paralyze over a short amount of time, but yet he's still here, still fighting, working hard day-to-day to make sure my mom and I have this beautiful house to live in. It's hard seeing my parents like this only because I'm not in a financial position to help them and I "make" them (unintentionally) help me by paying for the food in my belly, my bed to sleep in, my car I drive, etc. This is one of the BIG reasons I decided not to go to UMD-CP anymore, I couldn't possibly put my mom through it for another year. Now I don't want you guys thinking my family is dead BROKE, but I'm just saying my parents have worked hard to get this far.
Well the biggest bomb has just hit me yet. Today I find out my sister has breast cancer. She's only 28. Not married, no kids. Worst of all, her mother died from cervical cancer. (We have different moms, but same dad). She's young and still in school and she has to deal with this. Worst of all, alone. You see, my dad excommunicated her from the family because she ran away from home when she was MUCH younger. Since then he's refused her and doesn't keep contact with her at all. But my mom looks at her as if she's her own daughter, Calls everyday, sends her money, the whole kit-kabootle (sp). Oh, I know I already said worst of all, but this is REALLY it, my sister has chosen not to continue visiting the doctor and receiving any treatment.
So I'm feeling down, is this life? Is this really it? Is this what the TV, movies, books/stories are all portraying? Is this normal? If this is it, please let me know. Cause I don't know how to react, I don't know how to give it all back and say I want another one...

IM HUNGRY.

2008-09-21T20:16:00.001-04:00

I'm hungry. :-(

Jo Smiles: I Sing Lullabies

Break Break Down....

Ra Ra Ra Ma Ma Ra Ma Ra Ma Ma Ga Ga Ohh La La

It Ain't Me, Babe

Confessions

Stefani-Ish

Fears

real rap

unclear

12.18.09

1. Joanne

2. Joanne

5. Jo

hypocrite

party, party, party let's all get waasssted ;o]

piano lessons.

come over

tears dry on their own.

concentration

niggas want to leave when you say you out M U S T A R D

Response: Tila Tequila

day 1.

neglect x sincerity = apology.

Allow me to reintroduce myself.

Twitter Me Baby....

so this is me.

*Shriek*

Question of The Day

The New Sidekick

Took Me More Than 5 Min To Understand...

RanTHOUGHTSdom

Sidekick!

Echo?

Sticking To My Promise

I Have You To Thank Fellas :)

If This World Were Mine

Heavy Rotation

Laughing Out Loud

Missing Teacher, Teen Student Found

Manic Monday

I've Noticed That...

Chris Brown Exposéd AIM conversation

This Is A True Story

I Found A Dream That I Could Speak To

Oil + Water Don't Mix

She Speaks!

I Didn't Think It Would Go Like This, But...

Haven't You Heard?

What Do You Mean Am I Done? I'm Only Getting Started!

End of the 1st -Uary

Interesting

Smartest Suburbs + Small Towns

1. Bethesda, Md.

Got Me F-cked Up

You Do What You Do Well!

[Click]

I don't understand in 2oo9.

Clogged Drain

1:43AM

Do you hear me?

Rotten Egg

We Can't Be Mad At God.

OK...What?!

People Are F-cked Up

If This Is It, Please Let Me Know

IM HUNGRY.

Shriek